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Fellas, is it gay to eat bananas? Khalifa, unfazed, explained again: I tried to ask some male acquaintances whether they too avoided this phallic-fruit-in-mouth practice in public, but none of them would answer directly.

Hey wizkhalifa if you think eating a banana will make you wanna blow a guy you probably already wanna blow a guy. Also your logic is incredibly stupid, juvenile and homophobic.

You should try to be a smarter person. Either way, policing your own ut to avoid even the potential reactions of anyone else must be exhausting. Nearly everything women do is oversexualized to a fault, especially the consumption of phallic foods.

Slo-mo deep-throating an already dick-shaped item is a highly prized act in a woman. Women learn this early on and typically just go out there bravely and live their lives, one polish sausage at a time.

But some women pull a Khalifa and avoid it entirely. When I was 12 I had an experience that changed my life. I ate an icy pole on the tram.

As I happily licked the delicious lemony goodness off a stick two elderly men sat opposite me with odd looks on their faces. I suddenly felt self-conscious.

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I looked at my icy pole and then back at these two hideous hairy men having a Lolita moment. I was confused.

Contrast this with Khalifa, whose worst-case scenario is being embarrassed. The ability to think in a probabilistic way goes out the window.

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Then you ask yourself: No one can trust men at large not to turn everything into a dick situation. But the correct response to that fact of life is not to cower in gut and alter ourselves, least of all our fruit consumption.

So eat that banana with reckless abandon, and maybe even sexy solidarity. Take that banana to the face.

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Tracy Moore is a staff writer at MEL. Formerly at Jezebel.